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  • Losing Human Users, Facebook Releasing Chatbots for Lonely to Talk To
    by Maggie Harrison on September 25, 2023 at 9:14 pm

    Lonely Island Meta-formerly-Facebook, the Mark Zuckerberg-helmed social media company that continues to shout from the rooftops that its platforms are designed to "help people connect" and "bring people closer together," is marching forward with its solution for reviving declining user numbers: introducing an array of AI-powered chatbots to its services. […]

  • Woman Pleads Guilty for Flying Drug- and Porn-Laden Drone Into Prison
    by Noor Al-Sibai on September 25, 2023 at 8:09 pm

    Drone Striking Out An Australian woman has pleaded guilty after being caught flying (and crashing) a drone filled with drugs and porn into a prison yard with the intent to sell it inside. As The Guardian reports, 27-year-old Cheyenne Anniki Petryszyn pleaded guilty to two counts related to bringing drugs into a correctional facility — $119,000

  • Tinder Now Letting Rizzless Sad Sacks Pay $500/Month to Message People Without Even Matching
    by Noor Al-Sibai on September 25, 2023 at 7:00 pm

    Sad! If you get a message from someone you never matched with on Tinder, it's not a glitch — it's part of the app's expensive new subscription plan that it teased earlier this year, which allows "power users" to send unsolicited messages to non-matches for the small fee of $499 per month. As Bloomberg reports, the

  • NYPD Deploys Villainous-Looking Dalek in Subway System
    by Maggie Harrison on September 25, 2023 at 5:44 pm

    Doctor Adams Watch out, New Yorkers — the NYPD's new surveillance bot has officially arrived at a subway platform near you. On Friday, New York City Mayor Eric Adams finally deployed "K5," the NYPD's latest foray into robot-assisted surveillance technology, at the highly-trafficked 42nd Street subway station in Times Square, The New York Times reported

  • Elon Musk Apparently Bursts Into Tears With Surprising Frequency
    by Noor Al-Sibai on September 25, 2023 at 4:40 pm

    As several anecdotes from Walter Issacson's bombastic new biography illustrate, Elon Musk seems to exemplify some of the most notorious traits of his sun sign, Cancer: being a massive crybaby and having whiplash-inducing mood swings. Take, for example, a story from an extremely tense Christmas Eve in 2008. Musk was in the midst of securing

  • Scientists Say They've Invented a Speaker That "Mutes" Annoying People
    by Frank Landymore on September 24, 2023 at 9:18 pm

    Cone of Silence A new speaker can rearrange its seven "self-deploying" microphones to partition a room into so-called speech zones, allowing it to track the position of and identify different voices, even as they move. Even better, the researchers behind the invention say this pinpoint localization allows them to not only separate simultaneous […]

  • Experts Say NASA’s Mars Sample Return Plan Is Deeply Flawed
    by Maggie Harrison on September 24, 2023 at 8:18 pm

    Total Mess Houston, we have... so many problems. As Space News reports, NASA has delayed its Mars Sample Return (MSR) effort after an independent review board found several serious issues regarding the mission's timetable, price tag, and technical plans. The return mission, initially slated for 2026, has always been incredibly ambitious. Still, it's […]

  • Research Suggests That Bad Dental Health May Increase Risk of Dementia
    by Frank Landymore on September 24, 2023 at 7:18 pm

    Keep your gums and chompers spick and span, folks, because research suggests that bad dental health is associated with a greater risk of mental health decline. In fact, there's a growing body of evidence that shows that dental health may affect your risk of dementia, reports The Washington Post. "People should really be aware that

  • Harvard Says That for $1 Billion, You Can Rename Its Medical School
    by Maggie Harrison on September 22, 2023 at 6:55 pm

    Dealmaking Got a billion dollars burning a hole in your pocket? Harvard's got just the thing. As the Harvard student newspaper The Crimson reports, The Harvard Corporation — the governing body that prides itself on its status as the "oldest corporation in the Western Hemisphere," according to its website — has put the naming rights

  • Elon Musk’s Dad Says Someone at His Emerald Mine Got Eaten by a Crocodile
    by Maggie Harrison on September 22, 2023 at 5:45 pm

    Crocod-errol For an emerald mine that Elon Musk continues to claim doesn't exist, his father, Errol Musk, sure seems to know a lot about it. Despite having previously bragged about the existence of the Musk family's alleged emerald mine on record, Elon has spent the last year or so disputing his own claims, tweeting (when


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